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A Found Tone Poem Composed Entirely of Email Subject Lines I Have Received Today

SERIOUS ADVERSE EVENTS

could not find path

Even Steven goes to war

yay us.

Error lights and daughter windows

Once again terribly remiss . . .

Hey

Have you heard of HGH oral spray?

Hey Hey

I’m not a virus, I promise!

This room of . . . This Room and This Gin and These Sandwiches

Cost of living

Today

That’s why you’re hearing ducks

vintage hats are now GONE

Houston, we have a problem . . .